Why I Prefer Attachment Parenting (And What it Is) Part 1

Note: This is the first of a two-part Saturday Series post which is written by a fellow VoiceBoks member, Spanish Pinay. Enjoy!

Since we got pregnant, we’ve received a lot of unsolicited parenting advice. 

Many of which seems to be how we, the new parents, can defend ourselves from a “manipulative” and smart little creature: our baby girl.

Here are some of the well-meaning advice given to us:

• Only feed every 2-3 hours.

• Don’t take her in your arms every time she cries, she’ll get used to it and will learn how to manipulate you.

• Never, ever put her to bed with you no matter how much she cries. She’ll never get out of your bed until she gets married.

• Train her to soothe herself to sleep. Let her cry and sooner or later she’ll fall asleep.

• Take this book (from Estivil the Spanish version of Ferber), I swear it worked for us and a lot of parents we know.

Although we believed in these, we couldn’t really do any of them.

We were naturally taken towards doing the opposite.

• I couldn’t maintain a 2-3 hour interval for feeding nor could I resist not feeding her whenever she cried and asked for mami’s breasts.

• I couldn’t resist taking her in my arms every time she started fussing. Hubby felt the same way.

• At 4 months, when I was already able to lie sideways (after a C-section), we began co-sleeping. We loved the first experience so much that since then, we’ve been co-sleeping with our girl who is nearly 2.

• I nurse or rock her in my arms until she falls asleep. And if she wakes up, we start the nursing and rocking all over again.

• She particularly liked how hubby would rock her to sleep – he seems to have a specific rhythm mami does not.

• The stroller was her enemy so I carried her everywhere with my baby sling.

For a time, we worried about how we were as parents.

I was thinking that we may be harming her development – rather than helping her – until we came across the term: attachment parenting.

After reading up on it, we discovered that all along, we were practicing its basic principles.

Another realization I had was that I was actually doing what my mom did for all 6 of us siblings.

Back then, there were no parenting books or internet to teach parents what to expect and how to sleep or potty train a child, but she did exceptionally well. It’s great to take after my mom.

She defines what it is to be a natural mom.

Learning about attachment parenting helped us validate the type of parenting we’ve chosen.

Not that we’re looking for a label, but knowing that we’re not alone with the type of parenting we favor has given us more confidence as parents.

So what is attachment parenting? Read more about this new yet old parenting style next week!