A Really Effective Way to Hone a Child’s Problem Solving Skills

Do you know that without problem solving skills your kids may…

• Be physically violent, destructive, disrespectful and have abusive behavior? [Empowering Parents]

• Attempt suicide as a teen after a trigger (fighting with family or friends, family death or a break-up)? [Internal Medicine News]

Of course, these points aren’t set in stone but are worth your attention.

But why?

Why are these possible consequences of poor problem solvers?

To find the answer, let’s first take a closer look at this skill:

Defining problem solving

About (Psychology) says that it is a “…mental process that people go through to discover, analyze and solve problems.”

But we already knew that.

Here’s a more interesting definition.

According to Brainboxx there are two parts to problem solving.

1. Analysis. Breaking down a problem into parts or manageable pieces
2. Synthesis. Arranging parts to make sense of the problem at hand

Did you know that it’s also a coping method?

It’s what an article from Embrace the Future says.

And it makes sense.

Stress is a normal part of life and is often caused by problems.

How does one cope with stress?

By getting rid of the problem which is why developing this life skill at an early age is crucial.

Here’s what happens when children are without this tool

It leads to them feeling of powerless.

Every time they hit a road block they will remain behind it until their frustrations and anger manifest through tantrums, hitting, screaming and stomping. As mentioned earlier, it may lead to depression or suicide attempts in teens.

Let’s look at the flip side.

Here’s what happens when children have problem solving skills

They pummel through, jump or find a way around the roadblock.

It also gives them self-confidence and boosts self-esteem because it’s fulfilling to overcome obstacles. And if parents train children to view problems as learning opportunities, they grow into adults who do not fear challenges.

Now you’re thinking, “How do I teach my child to effectively solve problems?”

The problem solving process

1. Identify the problem. What do you think the problem is, Missy?
2. Seek out solutions. What do you think can be done about your doll not fitting inside the toy box?
3. Evaluate possible solutions. Okay, if you continue to press down on the doll, will that work?
4. Evaluate end results. Did that solve the problem? No? Okay, what’s another way to get the doll in the box?

*Repeat steps 3 and 4 until your child finds a solution that works.

Notice anything with the process? Your goal is to help them find a solution instead of providing one for them.

In addition, teaching this skill once or twice isn’t enough.

It’s an ongoing process that has to be practiced as often as possible. Do this and you lay the foundation for effective problem solving skills.

“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.”

Here’s your parenting challenge for today: Use the process with your children now.

What are your thoughts on this?

Photos by Creative Commons:
Question Mark – royblumenthal
Puzzle – Tsahi Levent-Levi